Wednesday 27 June 2012

A New Baby Born - And A Discovery


Yesterday afternoon a new baby arrived into the world.

I have discovered, that despite having one of my own, writing a blog, working in support for parents of premature babies, that I am as clueless as the next person.

What to say, what to do, what to think. This dear baby was born at 25 weeks and 2 days. She is a girl, she has a beautiful name. She is loved. She weighs 1lb 9oz, just a smidge more than Joseph did.

The thing is, the reason I know her mum (and dad) is that this isn't the first time they have walked this path. They had triplets at 25 weeks around the same time Joseph turned one. 2 boys and a girl. The boys came home, the girl, very sadly, lost her fight after rallying hard.

None of my resources that I have at my disposal are really of much use. My friend knows what is around the corner, what the journey is like, and the complications that can arise a long the way. No need for a care package with Tommy's resources and the Small Wonders DVD, she could have written them both. And that, I think, makes it worse. Her hope and innocence are gone. And so is mine. I know all we can do is wait, and hope, and pray.

This time my friend got great care, regular FfN tests, a cervical stitch, brilliant monitoring. However, she had pregnancy loss in between. Her triplets early birth was put down to the "multiple factor" initally, but the loss of a baby at 16 weeks proved there was an issue, and a good plan was put in place. But still the baby has arrived. It makes me cross that we can't do better than watch and wait. She had two positive FfN results, but so have friends. And they have gone on to have near term babies.

Pre term birth is still such a mystery, and its just breaking all of our hearts, our big circle of premmie mums that are surrounding this family in love, prayers and positive thoughts. There are no easy answers. Monitoring is wonderful, interventions, however, are few. And contentious. No one really can predict how a pregnancy will go, and no one can stop a pre term birth with any degree of accuracy. Some can be stopped some can't.

It's heartbreaking.

However this much I know. Where there is life, there is hope. Where there is love, there is peace.

We pray, we hope, we love.

And we take each moment as it comes.

The family have given me permission to blog about them today.


  1. Don't know what to say,in tears on bus as the memories flood back!
    Firstly congrats to the family and really hope all goes well and they get there bubba home at the end of the rollercoaster.
    Innocence and ignorance at the start of journey must have helped us and dealing with each complication as it came.they will know what could happen and I imagine with the triplets had most of them!
    Love to them all.
    Sam x

  2. Praying for a happy ending,


  3. I had PPROM (preterm premature rupture of membrane) at 25 weeks and gave birth at 32 weeks. Still do not know why and as far as I'm aware there is nothing to say it won't happen again with future pregancies. People who have not experienced having a prem baby don't understand that not only is it terrifying to have a premature birth, but the thought in the back of our minds that our other babies (if we want to have more children) may also be premature is also deeply upsetting for us. The worry, guilt. shame, fear, never leaves me.

  4. Congratulations to your friends and all good luck and hopeful prayers for their road ahead.

  5. That's a lovely post, Kylie. My thoughts go out to this new little one, and her family as she starts her battle to grow and thrive in the world she was not quite ready for.

  6. My heart goes out to them all, mummy, daddy, brothers, siblings no longer here, and of course the newest addition to the family. x

  7. Prayers for the family,it must be so hard doing all this again x